I don't know where this is going either.
I have destroyed so many lives. The people who are unfortunate enough to cross my path, should they live, come to regret it. So, can they just stop bringing it up?? It makes me feel bad! I am fully aware that I have wreaked havoc and struck terror in the hearts of many. I do …
Continue reading "The real victim is me, for feeling bad about being a supervillain."
“I would rather be scalded in the molten carcass of our civilization than watch another video explaining this nonsense ever again.” That was the sentiment expressed by a local fitness trainer and self-proclaimed ‘regular dude’. He had recently found himself in hot water over comments that were perceived by many to be in support of …
The Report in Question Invoices have been received, fees paid, and with a loud sigh, we can confirm that we are complete idiots.You guys remember this pandemic going on? Because we clearly forgot. Yes, our staff has been halved because of it, but there was this boat stuck in a canal which was a tad …
Boat got stuck. Looks kinda funny. Look at this dork. Silly ship. There's not a lot else to say really.You know how when you were a child and you could squeeze past a hole in some fencing like it was no big deal and then years later you revisit your childhood home but because the …
Continue reading "The Suez Canal – Evergreen Ship Situation Explained in Detail."
"Maybe kids shouldn't be going to school while all this is going on," said one prominent government official while gesturing at the gargantuan gorilla headbutting the atomic bomb-infused lizard.Godzilla versus King Kong! The event that people who don't live in densely populated cities have been waiting for since they last wreaked havoc. Get your hard-hats …
After plenty of deliberation, it has been decided that an elderly, dutiful, canine companion will not be accepted into The Good Place. Given his seemingly trustworthy, kind and loyal demeanor it has surprised many to see him be rejected from an eternity of pampering.For those who are unaware, The Good Place is the afterlife for …
Continue reading "Dog denied entry to The Good Place as his motivations were entirely treat-based."
You would like to be pulled from the wreckage of a collapsed building? Okay, that's going to cost you an arm and a leg which, by the looks of it, you seem to have already lost. Oh, this is at night? I'm afraid that's going to be extra. The Trickler doesn't have night-vision.After years of …
Continue reading "Capitalist superhero now charging people they rescue."
Last Wednesday, a poor, defenseless group of hedge fund managers found themselves losing billions of dollars. For one of them it meant not being able to refuel his private jet. A truly tragic turn of events.Now how was he expected to fly around the world? He can't take a commercial airline, there's a pandemic! How …
"I would never kill four people!"What about one?"That wasn't the question."I'm asking a different one now."Listen, you said it yourself; these murders are clearly linked. Four innocents slain in the prime of their lives in uncannily similar ways. I can't even fathom the inner-monster that would compel someone to take four lives!"Did you kill any …
"This toaster will change your life". Okay, you can try but you're a toaster. I don't have high hopes. What kind of life are you living where a toaster can have any significance?An Instagram ad for a toaster has made the fairly outrageous claim of being able to change your life forever. Bearing in mind …
The Ipe Collection 