It’s a well-known fact that 9 out of 10 dentists have unequivocal and absolute trust in Dentaall toothpaste. It has the right level of fluoride – not too much, not too little, depending on whether or not fluoride is a good thing or not. But, as always, there is a holdout keeping Dentaall from receiving …
Unfortunate: Every Idea this Budding Entrepreneur has is Wildly Illegal
Has this ever happened to you? You don a black turtleneck sweater, gather your creative energies and birth an idea so incredible that you know for certain that the world will never be the same. And then your friend -who by the way; is not a lawyer - comes up to you and has the …
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Coach’s Motivational Speech Not as Effective as Steroids.
The coach of a local football team was left red-faced as his team, fresh off completing a suspension following a doping scandal, fell to a 6-0 defeat to their rivals. This came despite not one, but two motivational speeches over the course of the match. The first came before kick-off, as he passionately screamed his …
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Dog Under a Lot of Pressure to Provide Joy in Family’s Life.
A local Labrador named Dixie has expressed her sheer panic at being the sole source of happiness in her miserable family’s life. The family – whose name was withheld by the canine – appear to be a mix of morose and needy individuals, making Dixie’s task of enriching their lives both necessary and difficult. As …
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Update: Norway is still where we last saw it
You can all breathe a sigh of relief. Your fears have been allayed. The Scandinavian nation of Norway is still where last left it. There have been no changes made whatsoever. Everything is normal. Please find below, photographic evidence of the country’s whereabouts. Norway is, without question, here. Exactly. Though….was it always shaped exactly like …
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Couple in action movie starting to realize they have nothing in common other than shared experience of surviving Nazi-Zombie-Robot attack.
Jack Manly and Beth Bruiser have each come to the heartbreaking realization that they have absolutely nothing keeping them in a committed relationship. That is, other than their survival of an assault by the unholy creations of Jack’s arch-nemesis and possible brother; Lord Arnheim ‘Destruction’ Maximillian. A year had passed since the couple’s filmed foray …
Woman Suspiciously Pauses Before Saying Last Word in….Sentence.
An Eastern European woman with a large scar across her face and a winged-bullet tattooed on her forearm has just aroused suspicion by pausing before completing her sentence. Speaking to a high-ranking politician, the woman seemed jovial and in good spirits as she wished him the best of luck in his hopefully not too short …
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Detective unsure whether blood stains on victim’s sheets look like a butterfly or two people kissing.
The blood-blot test A police detective investigating a homicide is currently in two minds regarding what image the blood stains on the victim’s sheets resemble. At first he saw a butterfly. According to some psychologists, this would indicate that he is in touch with nature and is also quite sensitive. The detective in question disagreed …
Iran changes name back to Persia to confuse American intelligence
“Whoa! Where did Iran go?” That was the cry from top American officials. With the looming threat of yet another endless war and/or semi-sanctioned invasion of the region, it is natural for all participants to look to seek a less nuclear option in order to sneak their way to an upper-hand. And it appears that …
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Poorly timed thunder really making this romantic proposal very creepy.
The forces of nature have conspired to turn a wonderful weekend getaway-proposal into an ominous nightmare. Hans and Sylvie had traveled to an idyllic countryside straight out of a Windows XP desktop, where Hans planned on popping the question. To be specific, the question of asking for her hand in marriage. To be even more …
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